so it's been a week, and I've kinda been MIA. You know a lot went down, so I was off line a bit. Hmph let's see. There was My Keeya luv's high school graduation. Major congrats on that. I totally love you for the major accomplishment. My cousin Arnold also graduated high school so MAJOR MAJOR congrats to him too...loved his Grad party :) Some chillin' with the besties- ya know had to do some reconnecting & even a date on Sunday night to start the week off. That one was kinda great, i like him :) On the flip side, I've been tryna set up my blackberry with the help of the ex ex who is all the way in PA... I heart my Julian. God knows what I would do without him when it comes to technical stuff. N E how, lots of pics to share...so I'll be back after work I suppose...this was just a run down
Monday, June 30, 2008
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
A friend of mine sends me a message over Myspizzle saying, "yo I witnessed some wild shit tonight." Me being Curious Ashmalli was like "tell me." & here goes his response:
"on my way back from the strip club last night my boy pickd up some druggd up white girl brought her to my udda boy crib n he beat it right in front of us...raw. n b4 he picked her up she looked like her pimp or boyfriend beat her up...eww. i am not shmokin wit that dude nooo mooo."
Wow Was all I could say. I saw this friend of mine today, and he proceeded to tell me the rest of the story. You know how the girl was extra drunk & she obviously was totally out of it.
Now I have mad issues with this situation which is why I'm thoroughly disgusted.
1. WTF would you have random sex with some random chick, and "raw" at that. People wonder how they get shit A.k.A. diseases...this is exactly how. It's almost like-let's call him Mr. Shupid ass- was asking for it.
& then poor girl. Although she put herself in the situation, I completely sympathize with her. She obviously has some kind of problems to have been in a situation like this one. & you know after, they just dumped the poor girl on the sidewalk. What an asshole. I swear.
As a generation we need to be more conscious, cautious, and careful when it comes to our very own well beings. If we don't look out for us, no one else will. This is exactly why "Young people ages 15-24 account for 42% of new HIV infections." Yes it is researched folks, that's almost half.
So smarten up folks. We are living in not so friendly times.
Are you talking care of you?
Sunday, June 22, 2008
I tell you being a girl is tough business. So so much to go through. I think I'm finally ready to ask that question. So far this summer I've been going through a world wind of emotions. First I kinda lost the 1st guy I've ever seriously loved but I guess everyone has to go through that, so what made me think I could escape it. With that notion, I've been trying to look at things on the bright side because really him and I are just not meant to be. Not tryna play him in the least bit, but he's the most selfish person I've ever met. Which leads to my questions unanswered.
Can you love someone and not want to make the relationship work?
- I know people have different notions but I personally believe it's not possible. I'm an only child & I have been for all my life now. I am probably one of the most selfish people you will ever come across (no worries I'm working on it). I usually just think about me, what makes me happy, all that jazz. But with this guy, I was never like that. I loved him so much I put my selfishness aside. I put a lot of effort into the relationship. I planned everything, made all arrangements, all he had to do was show up and he could hardly do that. Puzzling part is, he goes around telling everyone he loves me and we just can't work because he can't give me what I need. Mind you, I like pretty things, but I like to get them for myself so that was never an issue. He meant emotionally. WTF! So I pose another question to you fine blogging folks...
If you really and truly love someone, wouldn't you WANT to give them what they want? At least that's how I felt about him. I was always there...
Now I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place-that is how the saying goes right?
I'm not so trusting of guys anymore, but I guess that's for the best. I swear everyone things they got game. But behind this mini essay I just wrote my questions really are:
-If you love someone, wouldn't you want to give them what the need?
- Can you love someone and not want to make the relationship work.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
So tonight has turned into another random Friday. I'm sure there are things to do somewhere out there in this world, but I'm really just not up to it. Today I went to Philly to look at apartments and that actually went well. However, it took up most of my day and now I'm just drained. went shopping with Missy for a bit and added to the Bra collection. Come on, don't act like you don't know Vicki S's semi annual is on right now LOL. Luv it.
Speaking of shopping, it's pay day and my check is done already :( that shit is kinda depressing. I seriously need another job if I'm gonna survive. No idea why kids wanna grow up. That was never me, and now that I am -grown up that is- I still feel the same way.
N E how, I'm going to bed. Lots more to share, but just not tonight.
How's your Friday night?
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Alright, today I was actually gonna post a question that I really wanted an answer too. But an asshole pissed me off and I shall write about that instead.
I was talking to this guy, matter of fact he was talking to me because I could care less. He calls me last night and we're talking on the phone and he asks me what I'm doing on Friday. I said I'm going out with a friend and he keeps pushing to find out if it's a female or not. Finally he gives up, and says he's gonna go to bed, so being me -you know the one who doesn't care- I said bye.
This NIGGA -yes I said it- calls me back like three times and I really didn't feel like answering so I let that shit ring. He leaves a voicemail and this is how it goes:
"Yo I don't know who you think you are but you're being a bitch right now. You think you're the shit, blah blah blah blah....loose my number."
LMFAO..Homeboy def lost his effin' mind right? Yea, that's what I was thinking.
Like my girl B says," He must not know bout me." Shout outs to you Mr. Fean, I don't want your ass, I never wanted you, it's been 5 yrs now and you're still trying mad hard. So How bout you 1 yeaself (do people say that n e more LOL) & loose my shit because quite frankly, you act like I call you, dude you call me.
& for all you other dudes out there, that disrespectful shit does not work. You will be snipped snipped with the quickness. Yes I do think I'm the shit & quite frankly you should too...
Great, I got it all out. But real quick that "bitch" thing really pissed me off. It would have bothered you too right??
Saturday, June 14, 2008
I finally decided that it's time for my blue shoes, to come home to mama. Sure they aren't like Carrie's Manolo Blahniks, but heck I love them too. See I left them at the ex's house over two months ago, and I still haven't gotten them. I guess I just haven't had the guts to face him but I'm totally ready now. I'm sure my scenario won't end like Carrie's, I'm sure when I get to his house my blue pumps won't be waiting for me in his hands, in fact he might just leave that shit at the door...but hey, it's whatever. So tomorrow will be the day, yes tomorrow sounds good.
What has brought about the fantastic change of courage you ask? Well there's a new interest. Wouldn't wanna call it a love interest, but he's someone I really like, seriously. So I'm good and ready to let go of the past, but in order to do so, I need to bring my Blue shoes into the future; maybe even on a date with the "new guy."
Side note & totally random: Don't have burgers from Juniors- it's no good. I had a dinner date tonight with my brother, and my burger was straight up nasty.
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
The night I went to see Sex & the City started out a happy one. I rolled out my bed thinking today would finally be the day I see the movie with my three girlfriends Jodi, Missy, and Jackie. Fast forward to 11 at night and we're sitting in Fridays coloring before we go see the 12:35 AM show.
She was really getting into hers though :)
N E how...fast forward some more and the movie has begun. The ladies are coloring in the movie and we're all laughing at what a coincidence that us four was just doing the same thing they happened to be "doing."
But all of a sudden, things weren't so great anymore and I realized I went to see the movie for the same reason every other woman who has lost someone she loves did, to see if the ultimate couple of the "breakup" would get back together. If they didn't then I would know there was no such thing as hope, that I had lost one, that it was truly over. A bit overly dramatic huh? But hey! It was the truth.
But that didn't happen. Carrie and Big actually got back together after their zillionth breakup. So here I am sad as hell at the end of the movie cause I'm like damn, does this mean I should pursue my current situation. & then I realized.....
HELLLL NOOO!!!!! Although Carrie and Big were the ultimate "breakup" couple, although, he dumped her on their wedding day, although he broke her heart numerous times over, at the end of the day Karrie didn't go running back to him, he ran back to her. & that's the way it should be. At the end he made the effort and showed Karrie she was what he really wanted. So therefore, I am done!!! I am done chasing after some man who doesn't want to be chased. I've finally figured out that "life doesn't always turn out to be your fantasy, that's why you need friendships that are real to get you through it all." & that I do have. Well said Carrie B.
revealed by A.M. at Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Monday, June 9, 2008
So tonight I came home from work and felt really tired. Decided to get on YouTube and all of a sudden I was listening to old Whitney hits. This happens to be one of my most favorite.
How Will I Know- Major throwback
My mom usta sing this all the time when I was a little girl and so did I. I usta try to do the dance and everything from the video. Love Whitney man.
What's your favorite Whitney Houston song?
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Today is June 8th. Three years ago this was prom night and I was dancing my life away, here a flash back for ya :)
pretty cute huh?!?!
N E how...yea, so it's prom night and I'm having a grand time celebrating my high school career and there it happens,I meet this guy. No names to be mentioned cause gosh you people already know who he is. We exchanged numbers, actually called, and ended up in 3 yrs of something. 3 years later I'm finally putting that relationship to rest-permanently- and I wonder should it be one to be celebrated much like the prom or should it be looked upon as a major mistake.
Let's make a pros and cons list.
- I inherited a headache
- also a major heartbreak (I'm better now though :)
- I was never truly myself completely
- I spent ALOT of time crying
- I got more use to being disappointed than any girl should.
- I've been stood up more times than you and all your girlfriends put together
- At the end of the day, I'm not the same girl I use to be
- I got to experience love
- I met my best friend in the entire world
- I got to inherit an awesome extended family, his
- I now get advice from the smartest women I've ever met, seriously
- I love the munchkin; Malachai- his little brother
- I'm so EFFIN' smarter
- I'm not the same girl I use to be
What do you think? The relationship; to be celebrated or not?
Sunday, June 1, 2008
So today I was on myspace and came across a blog my gurl Drea posted. I loved it and just thought I should share it with you guys so here goes:
20 FABULOUS REASONS WHY BEING SINGLE IS LOVELY!!!
YOU GET TO SLEEP DIAGONALLY IF YOU FEEL THE NEED!!!
THE ABILITY TO HAVE SEX ON YOUR OWN TERMS WHENEVER YOU WANT WITHOUT OBLIGATION!!!
THE ABILITY TO COOK WHAT YOU WANT, WHENEVER YOU WANT WITHOUT A SCHEDULE OR COMPROMISE!!!
THE ABLILITY TO WATCH WHAT YOU WANT ON TV WITHOUT COMPROMISE!!!
THE ABILITY TO PLAY YOUR FAVORITE BAD MUSIC AT MAXIMUM VOLUME!!!
THE BATHROOM STAYS CLEANER FOR LONGER!!!
NO NEED TO STORE EXTRA CLOTHES = MORE ROOM FOR YOUR OWN STUFF!!!
8. YOU GET TO SAVE MONEY ON GAS AS IT IS NOW DAMN NEAR $4.
00 A FUCKING GALLON!!!
YOU ARE FREE TO MEET/CHILL WITH/GET TO KNOW OTHER GUYS/GIRLS WITHOUT FEELING GUILTY!!!
(FOR THE LADIES) YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT HOW YOU LOOK BEFORE BED!!!
MORE SLEEP, NO ARGUING OR DISCUSSING FEELINGS OR PROBLEMS AT FOUR AM!!!
YOU HAVE MORE TIME TO WORK OUT, RUN ERRANDS, DISCOVER NEW HOBBIES, OR DO NOTHING - ON YOUR OWN SCHEDULE!!!
YOU HAVE MORE TIME TO RECONNECT W/ YOUR GIRLFRIENDS/HOMIES!!!
MORE TIME TO FOCUS ON ACCOMPLISHING YOUR OWN DREAMS!!!
YOU DON'T HAVE TO CONSIDER THE FEELINGS OF ANYONE OTHER THAN YOURSELF!!!
YOU ARE FREE TO TRAVEL WITHOUT HAVING TO EXPLAIN SHIT!!! JUST GET UP AND GO!!!
17. (FOR THE LADIES) YOU CAN WEAR AS MUCH MAKE-UP AS YOU WANT WITHOUT WORRYING ABOUT IT GETTING SMEARED OR RUINED.
(LIP GLOSS FANATICS, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!)
NO ONE AROUND TO JUDGE OR QUESTION YOUR LIFESTYLE CHOICES!!!
MORE TIME TO SPEND WITH FAMILY MEMBERS OR LOVED ONES YOU MAY HAVE TAKEN FOR GRANTED (AND WHO KNOWS, THEY MAY BE ABLE TO INTRODUCE YOU TO A SPECIAL PERSON!!)
MOST IMPORTANTLY: BEING SINGLE GIVES YOU TIME TO REDISCOVER SELF-LOVE SO THAT THE NEXT MAN/WOMAN'S LOVE CAN BE FULFILLING AND POSSIBLE!!
-Written by Drea
~ so folks, got any other reasons why you think being single is so darn lovely :)