Friday, November 7, 2008

Me, him, her, and the dog!

Its Friday and I'm on my way back to NYC as we speak blogging via blackberry. Seriously, I'm dumb annoyed.

I really need your advice on this one so pleasseee read the entire thing.

I live in a two bedroom apartment with what I thought would be just my roommate and I. We both go to the same university, knew each other from high school. So its convenient. We split the rent, cable, and electric evenly. Back in August she told me she would be babysitting a dog a few days a week would that be okay? I said fine because I like doggies. Turned out to be her dog which lives with us. Don't really have a problem with it because I like the little thing but still why did she have to lie?

Whom I do have a problem with is her boyfriend. He is a cool guy but he is ALWAYS at my house no lie 7 days a week. One weekend she went home to NY for the entire weekend, I come home and here he goes.
Me: where is T?
Him: she went home to NY
Me: so what r u doing here? Him: watching the dog.

WTF!!! Can't u take the dog to your house. Then he goes, " I'm leaving, I may or may not be back." And strolls out the house with her key which she left him. I left the house for one second to go visit with the girls upstairs, he locked the door. I had to call her all the way In NY to tell her to tell her BF to open my fucking door. Then he has to nerve to say, "I thought u were going home." Nigga (and I never use that word, so u know I'm pissed) I am home, I pay the bills here not you."
I came home wed night from NY, there he goes again.
ME: Where is T?
Him: somewhere doing a project.

So I just migrated to my room. I feel like I can't be comfortable in my own house because he is there all the time when she is or isn't there. She walks around in her bra and stuff...I wanna be comfortable like that too. But ofcourse she can do that because its her man and I'm another girl. I can't do that cause he is always there. If I'm dressed skimpy in my room, I always have to put on extra clothes just to walk to the fridge or bathroom. I've had company over but best believe they leave when I do.

I don't wanna come off like I'm hating or being a bitch, and I know I have to keep in account that she also lives and pay bills there too. Things between us have been fine since we moved in and I don't wanna cause a strain. I'm not even there all week. I go home to NY friday mornings and come back Monday night. Therefore, I'm really only there 3 days a week. And for those three days I wanna be comfortable.
THIs IS WHERE U GUYS COME IN!!! what do ya'll think I should do that's reasonable for us both?

P.s. Ladies he even leaves my toilet seats up and empties my ice trays...ugh!!!

11 inspirations:

Sasha said...

Okay I shared rent with my aunt. Down the middle just like you, and her 17 year old daughters boyfriend was there 24 FUCKING 7 eating our food, using our washer and dryer, and one day he actually told me he didnt want to watch American Idol in my livingroom (as i asked him to change it) and he says "I'm watching Scrubs"


I almost lost it. But what I had to do was pull everone aside and let them know how I felt. It went good for a while but eventually I just moved OUT completely.

they just didnt understand. IF IM NOT FUCKING HIM I dont want to see him scratching his nuts on my couch watching my tv eating my food and doing his laundry in MY MF washer and dryer.

You share rent with her, you need to tell her if he wants to be in the house while she's gone he can start paying rent, but you would like to have some personal space in your home. try to come up with an agreement. like days he's alowed there and days he's not so that you can have your free time and space. but do it before you BLOW UP like i did.

Sexxy Luv said...

hey lil sis, didn't know i was coming to read about you being not cool!

here's what you do...sit her azz down and tell her that we need to split the rent 3 ways because all 3 of you are now living there. if she doesn't want to do that then tell her bf can not be there all day everyday especially when she is not there!

speak up!

hugz & ♥

aLwAySz said...

I think you should let her know, her BF being around so much is making you feel uncomfortable and it shouldn't even be a big deal or "she's a bitch"

It sucks so much ass to NOT be comfy in your own home, specially when you wanna walk around the house in your buckta. LMAO

On one of your trips we should link up, im sure we could paint the town RED!

kmx. said...

I think you and tu amia need to have a lil chit chat! If you guys are good friends, then just tell her that the fact that her BF is always around, even when she's not there, bothers you! I know it would bother me. If she's coo then she'll understand and tell him to go the fck home to hisown house or wherever. You might wanna mention the toilet seat & icetray things too...he needs to learn some manners, pronto!

K@LiENTe said...

ah hell nah!!!

mamaz farreal just sit down n talk to her n let her know how u feel....exactly what u typed.

thas very disrespectful. Yes she pays bills also BUT so do u....there has to be an understanding and boundaries....

good luck!

da.mistress said...

im a bit of a spiteful person, but i would do exactly what she does and see if she likes it. walk around comfortable, and see if she tells you to cover up, tell her she does it, why cant you? Tell him if he not paying bills, then he need to leave the toilet seat down!


you can just tell her you dont like what she doing and you pay bills there too...

but thats no fun!!!

TimahTimah said...

SMH. Ash you need to have a talk with her. Let her know exactly how you feel. To not be comfortable in your own home is ridiculous. Firstly, she should inform you well ask you if its ok that he stays there while she's gone. Secondly, you're gone 4 days a week he should have enough consideration to only stay over when you aren't around. Thirdly, address that toilet and ice tray ish because if you wanted to deal with that you would've shared an apt with a male friend. Fourthly, I don't think you should say that you all should split the rent three ways because then that would seem like you don't mind him staying there as long as he pays but no you want the nicca gone BUT he should contribute something like buy some juice or waffles or something lol. Why the hell did she lie about the dog? That was dumb. Lastly, how does she know you trust her man roaming around your crib freely while you're not there? Put your foot down because she's taking your kindness for weakness. He needs to leave when she does unless they ask if its ok with you. I think you're an only child like me and we need our space!

Good luck. Hopefully she's understanding and it doesn't cause any tension. Keep us posted on how it goes...

(vixenchick) said...

OMG at Sasha's story!

You should talk to her about the boyfriend. He's fucking gross for leaving the toilet seat up!



A.M. said...

Awww, thanks guys for all of the advice. I will be sure to let you guys know how the talk went, I plan on doing tomorrow night when I go back to philly :)

Jayne Dough said...

oh hell to the effin naw.
1- why the eff she lie about the dog. what if u didnt like dogs or sumthin. she was gon keep lying? she whack for that

2- i understand she gotta man but 7 days a week. shit can they miss each other. he needs to come up with 1/3 of that rent.

3- she went out of town and left him there with a key?? naw thats NOT COOL. under any circumstances. now if u woulda tried her man she woulda been mad, but it woulda been her faught. she whack.
im over here mad for you. you need to talk to the winch and let her know. its not coo. speak up girl.

StarzGazR said...

wow i completly understand your situation.. i have TWO roomies... and one has a girlfriend... so even tho its still all girls.. i can't walk aroun din boy shirts of oversized tshirts or anything...

Try talking to hr... just tell her that for the small amount of time you are home.. you like being comfy.. since you are paying rent.. if not ask her to split everything 3 ways... that way you'll have a less burden!!!